Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Using Time Well in the Single Season

For the introduction to this series on temptations faced by singles click here

In the last post, we started to look at two areas in which we would do well to consider if we are to avoid regret (and more importantly to avoid disobeying God). Specifically, the area of worry and use of our time. We covered anxiety last time, so today we'll take a look at our use of time.

Failing to be Faithful in Regards to Time
Every ounce of energy and every moment of time is a gift from God. Being unmarried may provide you with more freedom over how you will use your time.[1] You have more flexibility as to how you will use your time. With this come temptations to squander the gift. There are two main ways of falling into temptation in this area.

The first temptation is that of being selfish with your time. Paul explicitly says that one of the benefits of remaining unmarried is that a person is free from the cares and responsibilities of fulfilling martial roles so that he or she can demonstrate the glory of God in another way (1 Cor. 7:32-35). That way is undivided devotion to the Lord. In other words, the single person has fewer specific requirements as to how he or she must use time and energy. But, do not mistake this for freedom to do whatever you want with your time. No, it is the Lord’s time (just as it is for the married person).

Perhaps you are really enjoying being single because you are able to do what you want to do when you want to do it. If what you want to do, however, is selfish, that is an unbiblical reason to stay single. Such an approach is the opposite of what Paul describes in 1 Corinthians 7. If your free time is only filled with leisure activities and lazy days then you need to ask God to give you more of a zeal for His Kingdom and ministry to others.

Now, don’t get confused by this and go to the other extreme. The other extreme is failing to be faithful to God by over-committing. This is saying, “Yes” to every request you get without examining how to use your time best to glorify God. Maybe you feel like every waking moment must be spent doing and going. However, this is not the biblical picture. This approach to life arises from either a fear of disappointing others or a disorganized life rather than an undistracted devotion to the Lord.

Let me give you some examples. Perhaps you become so busy working, vacationing, or even serving that you become unfaithful in your personal spiritual growth. Or maybe you fail to serve others well because you are investing in too many people at once. You are unable to really have an impact because you are stretched too thin. Or maybe you do so much that you never rest.[2] 

If you are struggling with your use of time, let me suggest getting a godly friend to help you evaluate your schedule. If you are being selfish, ask him or her to help you think of ways to serve God and others with your time and energy. If you are over-committing, ask him or her to help you evaluate your current commitments and make adjustments. You may even ask him or her to help you consider future requests that people will make of your time.



[1] This is obviously not the case if you are a single parent or are caring for aging parents.

[2] It is pride if you do not think you need rest. You are a finite creature, not the omnipotent Creator. Our need for rest humbles us by forcing us to recognize, in a tangible way, that we are dependent on the only One who is self-sufficient. It is fear of man if you know you need to stop and rest but fear letting others down if you say “no.” In this case, you care more about what others think than what God requires of you.

Copyright Ben Khazraee. You may share this article with others, but please direct them to this blog rather than posting the text to your own website, blog, etc. You may share printed copies with friends as long as you do not charge more than the cost of producing the copies.

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