Find a "Good Thing:" Examine God's Providence, But Don't Try and Read It!

As we continue looking at principles for finding a spouse, we must not leave behind the importance of prayer. So, if you missed the last post, please go back and read it. Now we move on to the next principle. It is a bit tricky.

Examine God’s Providence, but Don’t Try to Read It

Sometimes when we think about praying for a spouse we quickly begin to pray for God to reveal His sovereign will to us. In other words, we ask God to show us what the future holds. It isn’t wrong to ask God to sovereignly direct your steps (Prov. 3:5-6). But, when we get fixated on figuring out His hidden, future will, we tend to overcomplicate things and set ourselves up for trouble.

When looking for a spouse, we should examine God’s providential[1] dealings. The situations He places you in do affect your pursuit of a spouse. Are you in major debt, still finishing school, or about to move to a new place for work? All these things will affect your decisions about when and how you will pursue a dating relationship. In addition, as a finite being, you cannot meet every eligible Christian on the planet. So, you must take into account God’s providence by considering those He has placed in your life.

However, we should not look at situations as “signs” from God. We often get into trouble because we start trying to interpret God’s hidden will for our lives by reading His providential dealings. The problem is that we cannot know God’s sovereign will for us outside of what He has clearly told us in His Word (ex. Christ is returning for us, we will be with Him in heaven, and other prophecies in the Bible). But we often start to try and figure out the future by looking at what God is doing. We don’t like having to walk by faith, so we begin looking at circumstances as another channel of special revelation from God. 

Don’t assume that just because this is the first guy to take an interest in you since you started praying for a spouse that he is “the one.” He might be, but he might not be. Just because she likes to watch science fiction movies does not mean that God is telling you to marry her. 

You can take all those things as God’s providential dealings, but you must not pretend like they are secret communications from God that you must decode.  God doesn’t call you to interpret His providence. God calls you to humbly live under His providence.  He expects you to trust Him by applying His Word, found in the Bible, to everyday decisions.

This is part of the series God, Singleness, and Marriage: How the Bible Gives Purpose and Direction to Singles

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[1] By providential I simply mean God’s sovereign, hidden will as we see it being played out in our lives. 

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