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Introduction
Within the first two chapters and last four chapters
of the Bible we find marriages (Gen. 2; Rev. 19). At the beginning of Jesus’
earthly ministry we find him attending a wedding (John 2). Weddings and
marriages seem to turn up at important moments in biblical history.
They are probably part of your experience, too. Maybe
you have attended a few and the thought of weddings strikes a note of hope and
joy as you look forward to your own marriage. Maybe you have attended many weddings
and are tired of the recurring and painful question that inevitably comes
during the reception: “So, when are you getting married?” For you, weddings bring up the painful fact
that you may never be married. Or, it could be that you enjoy attending
weddings but have little desire to get to married.
The
Most Important Thing about You
As we begin our journey to see what the Bible has to
say about singleness and getting married, I want you to realize that, if you
are a Christian, the most important thing about you is not your marital status.
It may feel that way at times. As many singles have noted, they feel like a
single person in married person’s world.
Every time you go out to eat and have to ask for “a table for one,” you
feel as if your most defining characteristic is the label “single.”
However, the Bible makes it clear that the most
important thing about you is that you are a Christian.[1]
You are not a single Christian. You
are a Christian who is unmarried.
This is not semantics. I am trying to get at what the Bible says is the most
defining reality for you, and it is not your marital status.
The
Goal of This Book
That being said, your marital status does affect the
way you live and experience life. And the Bible does say much about the topics
of marriage, singleness, and relationships. My goal in the pages that follow is
to bring some of the rich truths of the Bible on this issue to light.
If you are single and content, I hope that the words
in this book will encourage and empower you for even greater fruitfulness and
joy in serving the Lord. If you are single and hopeful of marrying in the near
future, I hope that you will be encouraged to maximize your time as a single
and to pursue marriage in ways which glorify God. If you are single and
struggling to be content, wondering if you have missed the opportunity to be
married, I hope you will be encouraged to trust God and thrive under His care
for you.
Where
We Are Going
This book is divided into three main sections. The
first is all about how the biblical storyline and the character of God give
purpose and hope to singleness. It begins by tracing singleness through the
Bible and demonstrating how God has redeemed the state of singleness for His
glory and our good. The second chapter examines the most robust passage on singleness
in the entire Bible, First Corinthians chapter seven, in order to give you a
vision for how to glorify God and utilize your singleness. The third chapter
applies the doctrine of God to your understanding of singleness in order to
strengthen your faith in God during an undesired time of singleness. Reader, you
may be tempted to skip over this part. You might find it hard to read through these
early chapters because you long for quick and practical steps to marriage. Let
me encourage you to do the hard work of studying theology – only then will you find
true hope and right practice.
The second major section of the book is about the
dangers and temptations that seem most pronounced during the single season of
life. All temptation is common to man, but we do well to examine what specific
temptations Satan may use to lure us away from our devotion to Christ. Again,
you may be tempted to skip this section, thinking that reading about sin is not
encouraging. But remember that our enemy seeks to devour us (1 Pet. 5:8), and
Jesus called us to watch and pray lest we enter into temptation (Matt. 26:41).
You would not go to war with an enemy and ignore the specific points of
vulnerability that he might seek to exploit against you. Neither should we
expect to live the Christian life in this fallen world without examining our
own weak points and shoring up our defenses.
The final major section gets into the practical
aspects of living in the single season of life. The first chapter addresses
issues that apply to all Christians
while the last two look more specifically to Christians who are single but
desire to be married. However, I do think that those who are not seeking
marriage will still find these chapters beneficial.
We will conclude with a chapter about a wedding
reception that all Christians will attend, which will be the most joyful
wedding feast ever. Maybe you hate going to wedding receptions and being
reminded that you lack what you so badly want. But I guarantee that this is one
reception you will be glad to go to. We have a lot of pages to cover before we
get there. So, get reading.
Copyright Ben Khazraee. You may share this article with others, but please direct them to this blog rather than posting the text to your own website, blog, etc. You may share printed copies with friends as long as you do not charge more than the cost of producing the copies.
Copyright Ben Khazraee. You may share this article with others, but please direct them to this blog rather than posting the text to your own website, blog, etc. You may share printed copies with friends as long as you do not charge more than the cost of producing the copies.
[1]
Though maybe you are not a Christian. A Christian is not simply a person who
goes to church or even likes Jesus. A Christian is a person who has recognized
that they have sinned and rejected their Creator and are worthy of His just
condemnation. They do not think they can earn God’s forgiveness by doing good
things. They understand that Jesus, God’s perfect Son, lived the perfect life
they failed to live and then died on the cross to satisfy the justice and wrath
of God. They receive this blood-bought forgiveness by turning away from sin
(repentance) and turning to Jesus as their only hope of salvation (faith). If
you haven’t done this, you should spend some time studying the gospel (good
news) of God by reading the Gospel of Mark, from the Bible, with a Christian
friend.
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