Friday, July 17, 2015

A Tale of Two Responses: Seeing Abortion for What It Is or Obscuring the Point

I recently watched a video from Planned Parenthood in which Cecile Richards, it's president, responds to the video that shows the chief abortion doctor discussing the sale of organs from aborted babies (see video below). I also watched Senator Lankford address the Senate about the same video (see video below). The contrast is striking and very telling.

Cecile Richards focuses on the issue of not making a profit of fetal tissue and that they are not doing anything illegal (which is actually debatable at this point). She apologizes for the "tone" of her staff member. Which seems to miss the point. If this is not human life we are talking about why is there a need to apologize? This is nothing more than a doctor talking about some routine organ removal. The apology seems to reveal that Cecile Richards knows that American's consciences are not buying that argument. Denny Burke has some good thoughts on her response, so I'll refer you to him. 

Senator Lankford speaks on the more fundamental question which cannot be dodged and he his clarity and conviction is tremendous. He basically asks, "How is that we have hearts and lungs and human heads to sell if abortion is nothing more than scraping out some tissue from a mother? If it has human organs it is a human. And if our declaration of independence declares that all persons are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights, namely the rights to LIFE, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, how is that we allow abortion to continue in this nation?"

It will take more than a look into accounting ledgers to answer his questions. May God awaken the consciences of many and grant us mercy so that we might end the oppression of the weakest among us.





Note: Planned Parenthood performs about 900 abortions every DAY.

"'A Lot of People Want Intact Hearts These Days' - Planned Parenthood, Abortion, and the Conscience of a Nation"

Albert Mohler has a great article on the issue of the recently released undercover video showing Planned Parenthoods admissions to selling "parts" of aborted babies. Near the end of his article he writes:

I have no reason to believe that the video is anything less than totally credible. But, even if Planned Parenthood somehow finds a way to evade justice in terms of criminal activity, the part of the video that Planned Parenthood does not –and cannot — deny reveals their senior medical director enjoying a conversation over a meal in which she describes tearing apart the bodies of unborn human beings in order to get the desired organ: “I’m gonna basically crush below, I’m gonna crush above, and I’m gonna see if I can get it all intact.” 
When the Allied forces liberated the concentration camps of the Nazi regime, General Dwight D. Eisenhower ordered the ordinary German citizens of nearby towns and villages to walk through the camps and to see what they had allowed and facilitated. Eisenhower’s point was all too clear — you allowed this to happen, and you share the guilt. 
 Here is the Planned Parenthood admission on video. As one blogger wrote, it should be a civic duty for every American to watch it and then decide for themselves is this is as some prochoice folks argue "no big deal."


Is Online Dating OK?

In the last post I argued that "missionary dating" is unbiblical and must be avoided. Now I turn to a method that I would be VERY cautious of. 

A Method to be Cautious of: Online Dating

In God’s providence, you and I live in a time of amazing technological advancements. Through the internet, we have the ability to communicate with people whom we might otherwise have not met. This has given rise to online dating sites.

I do not think the Bible prohibits online dating by direct command or by indirect principles. But I do think there are some biblical principles which we must take into account. Below are six cautions to take into consideration.

The first is the issue of motivation. In one sense this is not unique to online dating. As Christians, we realize that God cares about our motives, and, so, we must always seek to have God-honoring motives. When it comes to online dating, it would be good to consider why you are doing this. Is it out of desperation? Is it motivated by doubting that God is able (or willing) to bring you a spouse? Is it an attempt to force a relationship to happen on your time table? It might be or it might not. Perhaps you are content with where the Lord has you and see this as a means by which you are responsibly pursuing marriage.

The second issue to be cautious about regarding this form of finding a date is the lack of “natural” interactions. When you meet someone at church, work, or school, you typically have the opportunity to naturally get to know him or her over time. You can observe their character and interact with them as friends before initiating a dating relationship. Online dating, however, generally means that the first time you communicate is with the explicit intention of finding a date/mate. You may not have opportunities to simply observe them in group settings and to allow the relationship to naturally develop.

The third issue is a potential lack of accountability. Online dating allows you to have interactions with a member of the opposite sex without your church community knowing the details. It has the potential to encourage isolation as well, since you probably do not have common circles of friends. Isolation is dangerous because sin and temptation abounds in such conditions. Sin is deceitful, especially when we are isolated (see Heb. 3:12-13).

The fourth issue is that online dating makes it easier for you to misrepresent your qualities and downplay your shortcomings (they can do the same thing). I recently saw a commercial in which a young woman is telling her neighbor that anything you read on the internet is true. She then says she is waiting for her date, a French model she met online, to show up. Just then an overweight, unattractive American man wearing a fanny pack walks up and says “Bonjour.” Without flinching she walks down the street with her “model” date. You can’t believe everything you read online, and a lack of community and face to face interactions makes it easier to be deceived and to deceive.

The fifth issue is that online dating may promote laziness and lack of courage in men. Let’s face it, finding a date requires courage. Asking a woman out means the risk of being shot down. And it takes a lot more risk to spend time serving and getting to know the single women in your church than it does to sit in front of your computer with your PJ’s on and scroll through a bunch of profiles on the screen.

Finally, online dating tends to more easily promote self-seeking relationships. Again, every relationship could be this way. But in online dating, you are looking at a bunch of people and evaluating their qualities to decide if you want to “buy in” to a date. It can become consumeristic, instead of a servant-oriented way of thinking about others. The temptation is to treat the people as profiles: to treat the person as if they were a piece of furniture on the Antique Roadshow to be evaluated to determine their real worth. This is not necessarily true, but the potential for this must be carefully guarded against.

If you plan on being involved with online dating (or already are), let me offer a few pieces of wisdom to help you avoid these potential pitfalls.

The first thing is to involve an older, godly Christian brother or sister who has a solid perspective on biblical relationships and who will hold you accountable. Give them access to your profile and messages. This will allow them to keep you honest and to keep your communication wholesome and God-honoring. It is also important to have their help in protecting you from harm since online dating may lend itself to predators.

The next thing I would suggest is to limit your search to singles in a radius that is within easy driving distance. If the potential date is too far away, you run the risk of being in an isolated relationship and lack the opportunity to get to see each other interact in groups of peers (a good place to see the person’s character). You also run the risk of being a poor steward of the time and money God has given you if you begin a relationship which requires long trips to see each other.

Third, make sure you talk theology with any potential date. You don’t have to grill your new friend (especially not on the first date). But, you need to find out what they believe about important doctrines such as who God is, how to be rightly related to God, the authority of the Bible, etc. Theology is extremely important because it affects the way you live out your faith. Since you are not meeting in the same church, you need to spend a little more time checking to make sure you have agreement on major biblical issues.

Fourth, take the relationship offline and into the church community as quickly as you can. Spend time getting to know each other in groups of friends. You probably shouldn’t immediately start attending their church,[1] but you should involve people from your church and their church in the process as much as possible. 

Conclusion
We have spent a lot of time looking at an approach to dating that should be avoided and another of which you should be cautious. You may wondering, “What approach should I employ in seeking a spouse?” While the Bible doesn’t give us a particular method, it does give us some direction. In the next post, I will spend some time on this subject.

This is part of the series God, Singleness, and Marriage: How the Bible Gives Purpose and Direction to Singles



[1] I say this because this may move the level of commitment up too quickly. Switching churches is a big deal. You have made a commitment to your local body of believers. You should not leave those relationships lightly. Obviously, if you are engaged or married, you should be worshiping and serving side by side in the same church with your fiancĂ© or spouse. 

Copyright Ben Khazraee. You may share this article with others, but please direct them to this blog rather than posting the text to your own website, blog, etc. You may share printed copies with friends as long as you do not charge more than the cost of producing the copies.

Thursday, July 16, 2015

Should We Attend a Gay Wedding?

Here is a helpful answer from John Piper to this question. We would do well to consider this issue as it will probably be a situation we might be more likely to face.

Is It OK to Date Someone Who Is Not a Christian?

Last time, I left you with a cliff-hanger. Does the Bible give us any direction when it comes to issues of whom we can date or how to pursue a dating relationship?  My answer is obviously "Yes" (otherwise why waste these pixels and post?). 

Today, I want to address a method the Bible says we must avoid. Next time we'll look at a method I think we should be cautious of. Finally, we will look at principles the Bible does give us for pursuing a spouse. 


A Method to Avoid: Missionary Dating
I have heard it said that the Bible says nothing against a Christian dating a non-believer. Most Christians would at least agree that such a situation is not ideal, but I have seen several men and women, in desperation, enter into such relationships. Usually they begin by saying they will not date the non-Christian, and that they are simply spending a lot of time together in order to try and win them to Christ. Before long however they are in a dating relationship, now saying that they would never consider marrying the nonbeliever unless he or she becomes a Christian.

I will not sugar-coat this for you. This is a method which the Bible requires you to avoid. Seeking a spouse among unbelievers is not a God-honoring method. I am not saying there is a verse that says, “Thou shalt not date nonbelievers.” That does not mean the Bible allows for it. In fact, there are many areas of life the Bible doesn’t explicitly address which it, nonetheless, clearly prohibits in principle. For example, it does not say, “You cannot participate in a Ponzi scheme.”[1] But there are clear biblical principles that would prohibit it (ex. not lying, not stealing, etc.). In the same way, the culture in which the Bible was written didn’t have what we know as dating, but the Bible still has much to say about the issues surrounding modern dating.

The Bible clearly addresses the way Christians are to relate to non-Christians, and it is in a way which prohibits pursuing close relationships (i.e., dating and marriage). I will show you a couple passages that teach this, but there are many others.

First, in 2 Corinthians 6:14-15 Paul says,

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever?

In the context, Paul is telling the Corinthians how they are to show their love towards him, the one who is a spiritual father to them (v. 13). There was a faction that was rejecting his apostolic authority, and he is telling the Corinthians not to be yoked with these unbelievers. To be yoked is to be “hitched up” together. The picture is that of two animals hitched together with a yoke to plow a field. So, this is an illustration of the fact that Christians must not be tied together or closely allied with unbelievers. Specifically, in this passage, Paul is saying not to be in close alliance with those who are unbelievers and stirring up division in the church. But the principle would apply to any situation in which Christians would link closely with those who do not serve the same Lord. The reason I say this is that Paul grounds his specific command in the broader principle that those who are seeking the righteousness of God should have no intimate relationship with those who serve false gods (which is every unbeliever).

To make this clearer, Paul goes on in verses 16-18 to say that we (Christians) are the people of God. He is quoting from several Old Testament passages in which the Israelites are called God’s people and told to be separate from unbelieving nations around them. Paul is now applying to New Testament believers this idea of being set apart to God. Think about it: in the Old Testament, God was very clear that intermarrying with the pagans was not acceptable. It would lead the Israelites away from God. The same is true today. Those who are closest to us will influence our walk with the Lord.[2]

Since I’ve found that the pull towards justifying dating or marriage relationships with unbelievers can be strong for singles, I want to look at another passage to bolster my point. In 1 Corinthians 7:39, Paul says, “A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.” Here, Paul is specifically addressing the issue of marriage. Here, he has a word for widowed women who are in the position of picking a spouse. They can choose whomever they want as long as he is “in the Lord” (i.e., a Christian).

In New Testament times, a woman was not likely to be able to choose her first spouse. This was usually arranged by her parents. So, if she was going to choose who to marry, it would have been after being widowed. In such a case, where she gets the choice, she is required to marry a Christian. Therefore, in our culture, in which we have the choice of whom we will marry, we must marry a Christian -- end of story.

“But what if I just date them? I won’t marry them unless they become a Christian.” The Bible still says this is an ungodly relationship. There are three reasons I say this.

The first reason this is ungodly is that it lacks Christian love for others. In chapter 5, I have already elaborated on the idea of dating with no intent on marrying. So, I will just mention that it is unloving because it is basically using the other person so that you can have enjoyment and companionship.

Second, if you are hoping that he or she becomes a Christian so you can get married, I believe you are being confusing and manipulative towards the nonbeliever. This attitude confuses your unbelieving date because you say your ultimate allegiance is to Christ, and then you pursue a degree of intimacy with a person who does not have Jesus as their Lord. It looks as if Jesus’ lordship just means you try to live a morally upright life, instead of revealing that He really rules over every area of your life (including your human relationships). This can also be manipulative because it is like dangling the carrot of a deeper relationship in front of your non-believing friend if only they will convert. This all seems to reek of worldly thinking and not Christian love.

Finally, this is an issue of where your ultimate love is focused. I am convinced that the reason most Christians date an unbeliever is that they love and desire a human relationship more than they desire to love Jesus. They may not say that, but their actions seem to prove it. Jesus calls us to a devotion to Himself that allows for no rivals. Even our relationship with a Christian spouse cannot be allowed to overshadow our love for Him. Jesus said it this way, in Matthew 10:37-39,

Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.  And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.  Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

This is a sobering thought. Am I willing to die to self to really live in Christ? If the answer is “No,” then we do not have the life of Christ in us. If the answer is “Yes,” then every other relationship is properly ordered under our allegiance to Jesus and His will. Believing the lie that satisfaction is found ultimately in human relationships rather than our relationship to Christ is deadly to the soul.

The great pastor JC Ryle advised young men to “never make an intimate friend of anyone who is not a friend of God.” He said,

Believe me, the importance of this advice cannot be overrated. There is no telling the harm that is done by associating with godless companions and friends. The devil has few better helps in ruining a man’s soul. Grant him this help, and he cares little for all the armor with which you may be armed against him. Good education, early habits of morality, sermons, books, regular homes, letters of parents—all, he knows well, will avail you little if you cling to ungodly friends. You may resist many open temptations, refuse many plain snares; but once take up a bad companion, and he is content. … You must recollect, we are all creatures of imitation: precept may teach us, but it is example that draws us. There is that in us all, that we are always disposed to catch the ways of those with whom we live; and the more we like them, the stronger does the disposition grow. Without our being aware of it, they influence our tastes and opinions; we gradually give up what they dislike and take up what they like, in order to become more close friends with them. And worst of all, we catch their ways in things that are wrong far quicker than in things that are right. Health, unhappily, is not contagious, but disease is. It is far more easy to catch a chill than to impart a glow; and to make each other’s religion dwindle away, than grow and prosper. Young men, I ask you to lay these things to heart. Before you let anyone become your constant companion, before you get into the habit of telling him everything, and going to him in all your troubles and all your pleasures—before you do this, just think of what I have been saying, Ask yourself, “Will this be a useful friendship to me or not?” [3]

Please don’t misunderstand. Ryle’s point, and mine, is not that you must avoid unbelievers like the plague. We must love and reach out to unbelievers. We do not fear becoming “unclean” merely by relating to unbelievers.

The point is, will this friendship help you better love God? If so, then a close friendship is permitted. If it will not, then your relationship with them is not that of a close friendship. If you don’t have Christ in common, then you are, by definition, going in two very different directions despite any “chemistry” you might feel or common interests you may have. You serve God, and they are under the power of Satan (John 8:44, 2 Cor. 4:4). You are in the Kingdom of God, and they are in the domain of darkness (Col. 1:13). Therefore, your relationship to an unbeliever is one of seeking to rescue them from a burning building, not of slow dancing with them by the light of the fire of coming judgment.

Dear brother or sister, perhaps you are in an “unequally yoked” relationship. Maybe you have never given much thought to what the Bible says on this issue. Perhaps you have not given much thought to your own motives in dating a nonbeliever. I urge you to consider the passages mentioned above and to examine your own motives. If you are already in a relationship with a nonbeliever, you must end it. Do it graciously and humbly (admitting how you have sinned against the Lord and them), but do it you must. Ask an older godly man or woman in your church to help you think about how to do this in a way that shows love to the other person and which upholds your undivided devotion to your Lord.


This is part of the series God, Singleness, and Marriage: How the Bible Gives Purpose and Direction to Singles


[1] A Ponzi scheme is offering people an investment opportunity which is really a fraudulent attempt to get their money from them in such a way that they do not notice the theft for a very long time.

[2] This does not mean you may divorce a non-believing spouse. Paul explicitly rejects this in 1 Cor. 7:12. But it does mean that before marriage you must make the choice to not enter into such a relationship (cf. 1 Cor. 7:39).
[3] Thoughts for Young Men, pg. 27. 

Copyright Ben Khazraee. You may share this article with others, but please direct them to this blog rather than posting the text to your own website, blog, etc. You may share printed copies with friends as long as you do not charge more than the cost of producing the copies.

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

"Planned Parenthood and the Atrocity of Corpse-Selling"

Here is a good article by Russell Moore on the Planned Parenthood video revealing they sell the parts of aborted babies.

His conclusion is a good call to us:

The children torn apart in abortion facilities have no names, but God knows their names. They have no resting places but Jesus grants them rest. If we are called into the kingdom of a just Messiah, one who welcomes children, we should stand up and speak up for the vulnerable ones He loves. These children may be just another line item in the abortion industry’s profit ledger, but they share the humanity of our Lord Jesus—and we must plead for justice for them.
It is time for the reborn to stand up for the unborn.

"The Place of Prayer and Fasting in the Pro-Life Movement"

Here is a link to an article on the importance of praying and fasting, specifically applied to our warfare against abortion. This does not manipulate God, but it does show that the battle does not belong to the strong or wise, but to the Lord, and so we forgo food to desperately cry out to him to act for his glory.

John Piper has suggested we pray and fast today during our lunch hour. If you are not able to, consider doing it another time.