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The
Biblical Storyline and Singleness:
How
Singleness is Redeemed
Have you ever read Genesis 2:18 and 1 Corinthians 7
back-to-back?
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make
him a helper fit for him.” (Gen. 2:18)
To the unmarried
and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am… So
then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage
will do even better (1 Cor. 7:8, 38).
Does this seem to contradict? At the beginning of
the storyline, we read God saying “it is not good that man be alone” and then
instituting marriage. But, by the time we get to the New Testament, we see Paul
saying
that remaining unmarried is good and, in some circumstances, “better” than
marriage. It seems that as the biblical storyline progresses, singleness goes
from being “not good” to “good.” How are
we to make sense of this?
In the next two chapters, I want to spend some time trying
to answer this question. In this chapter, we look at the big picture of the
Bible and how marriage and singleness fit in to storyline of the Bible. We will
examine why singleness was an unwelcomed experience in the Old Testament and
how it became a potentially good status for New Testament believers. In the next
chapter, we will zoom in on First Corinthians chapter seven to catch the
biblical vision for how singleness should serve the glory of God.
There
is much at stake in understanding what the Bible has to say about singleness. A
wrong view will result in singleness being wasted or marriage being idolized. A
correct view will help you get a better grasp on the significance of both
marriage and singleness in God’s plan for the universe.
I pray this will help you better understand your own place in God’s plan.
The
Big Picture of the Bible and Singleness
As we begin, it is important to understand that the
Bible isn’t a compilation of wise sayings, wonderful poems, and detailed laws. It
does include all those things, but the Bible is actually a unified story about
God and His dealings with His creation. Like any good story, the plot continues
to develop with each passing page and, in the Bible’s case, with each century
of history.
As God’s plans and promises unfold, we find that marriage
and singleness both end up serving
the Kingdom of God in unique ways. That
is not, however, where the story starts. It begins with a focus on marriage and
the offspring which marriage produces. How,
then, do we get to a point where marriage and
singleness serve the Kingdom?
As we look at the role of singleness in the biblical
storyline, I want to show you two reasons for the shift in the biblical view of
singleness. The first reason has to do with the grand role marriage and
offspring play in the drama of redemption
and the second deals with the differences in how individuals experienced the
blessings of God in the Old Testament and New Testament. Here are summaries of
these two points I will seek to demonstrate as we trace things through the biblical
storyline:
1. In
the Old Testament, the promise of offspring (or “seed”) is central to the
unfolding plan of redemption. In the New Testament, the fulfillment of this
promise comes in Jesus Christ.
2. In
the Old Testament, believers personally experienced the blessings of God most
tangibly and directly through marriage and the offspring it produced. In the
New Testament, every believer experiences spiritual blessing in Jesus Christ.
These two points provide the explanation for how and
why things change over the course of biblical history. As you will note, the
explanation has to do with the fact that God’s plan to save a people for
himself was designed to unfold over the span of time and covenants.
I will trace these two points through the Old, and then into the New Testament.
The
Old Testament: Marriage and Offspring Are Good, but Singleness Is Not
The
Promised Seed and God’s Plan of Redemption
Early in the biblical narrative God says he will
make for Adam a helper compatible to him, namely woman (Gen. 2:15). Marriage is
God’s design, and it is intended to provide companionship and the ability to
“be fruitful and multiply” as man and woman fulfill their God-given role of
ruling the Earth (Gen 1:28, 2:18). This first couple becomes the parents of the
entire human race.
God made Adam and Eve holy and happy. But things
quickly go downhill. In Genesis 3, Adam and Eve are tempted by Satan and rebel
against God. In the aftermath of this sin, God pronounces curses on all the
parties involved. Physical and spiritual death is the consequence of sin. There
is now a need to be saved from God’s just wrath against sin.
However, God gives a ray of sunlight in the gloom of
judgment. While cursing the serpent, who is Satan (cf. Revelation 12:9), God
states that the offspring, or seed of the woman, will one day crush Satan’s
head (Gen. 3:15). This is the first glimpse into God’s plan to redeem a people from sin
and Satan, and it involves the idea of offspring and, by extension, marriage.
From Genesis 3:15 through the rest of the Old
Testament, God’s people await the promised seed of the woman who will come and
defeat the ancient foe. This reality of a promised seed adds a new, redemptive
urgency to the earlier command for man and woman to “be fruitful and multiply”
(Gen. 1:28).
The
Seed of the Woman Continues: The Abrahamic Covenant
When we get to Genesis 12, we find that the line of
the promised seed zooms in on a man named Abram. God makes some pretty big
promises to Abram, declaring,
And I will make of
you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you
will be a blessing. 3 I will bless
those who bless you, and him who dishonors you I will curse, and in you all the
families of the earth shall be blessed (Gen. 12:2-3).
God promises to make Abram a great nation, a great
name, and a blessing to all the families of the earth. It becomes clear that offspring are central to God’s promises
to Abram, and to the world, when we see God saying things like:
Behold, my
covenant is with you, and you shall be the father
of a multitude of nations. No
longer shall your name be called Abram, but your name shall be Abraham, for I
have made you the father of a multitude
of nations. I will make you exceedingly fruitful, and I
will make you into nations, and kings shall come from you. And I will establish my covenant between me and you
and your offspring after you
throughout their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be God to you and
to your offspring after you (Gen.
17:4-7, emphasis added).
As you continue reading through Genesis, you will
find that marriage and the offspring it could
produce play a major role in the
storyline and the anticipated fulfillment of God’s promises.
Personally
Experiencing God’s Blessings in the Old Testament: The Mosaic Covenant
Fast forwarding to Moses, we find that God’s people,
now the nation Israel, are living in Egypt. While the people are in Egypt, they
are blessed with many offspring (Ex. 1:7), but they are not in the land God
promised them. In fact, they are enslaved under Pharaoh. So, God acts to redeem
His people from Egypt.
Once the Israelites are brought out of exile they
are given the law. This
is what is referred to as the Old Covenant. In the law, God promises blessings
when the people obey. These blessings include physical offspring (Deut. 28:11).
God also promises curses for disobedience. One of the curses for high-handed
disobedience was that God would blot out a person’s name (Deut. 29:18-20). If
your name didn’t continue (i.e., if your offspring didn’t live on) you would be
erased from the tangible experience of God’s blessings. Barry Danylak
summarizes it like this:
Having one’s name
‘blotted out’ (e.g., Deut. 29:20) was the capstone of personal disasters. No
surviving children in ancient Israel meant the loss of one’s inheritance, name,
and covenantal blessings. Conversely, marriage and offspring were fundamentally
necessary for the reception of all the covenantal blessings.
So,
in the Mosaic (i.e., Old) Covenant, we see that believers personally
experienced the blessings of God in a tangible way through offspring. Legitimate offspring, of course, required
marriage.
The
Seed of the Woman Continues: The Davidic Covenant
As we press on in the biblical story, we come to King
David, another significant person in the progression of God’s plan of
redemption. In Second Samuel seven, God makes some big promises (another
covenant) to David and his offspring.
If you compare this covenant to the promises made to
Abraham in Genesis, it becomes clear that the line of promise is continuing
through David. God promises to make David a great name (2 Sam. 7:9), to raise
up his offspring (v. 12), and to establish his kingdom forever (v. 12-13).
Thus, the line of promise has zeroed in on David and his son.
What is new is that this long awaited offspring will not only be a Savior, but
also the King of God’s people. It becomes obvious, however, that David’s immediate
son, Solomon, will not be the ultimate kingly
seed. At this point, God’s people are still waiting for the promised offspring.
What
We Have Seen so Far
Marriage, and the offspring it could produce, has
been central in the overarching story of God’s plan to redeem people. The
people are awaiting the promised seed. Marriage and offspring have also been central
in the everyday lives of individual Israelites because it was through these
that they experienced many of the covenant blessings in tangible ways. This explains
why marriage was considered a necessity for every person in the Old Testament.
And this is why those who were single or barren were not envied. In fact, they
were pitied by others and often experienced great sadness.
Something
New is Coming: The Prophets
When we get to the prophets, however, we begin to
see that a change is coming. God unveils more details about the One who will
come to redeem His people. And, in the process, He has some pretty amazing
things to say about the barren and unmarried.
For starters, in Isaiah 54:1, we read
“Sing, O barren
one, who did not bear;
break
forth into singing and cry aloud,
you
who have not been in labor!
For the children of the desolate one will be more
than
the children of her who is married,” says the Lord.
In light of what we have seen so far in the storyline,
this is an astonishing call to singing. The
one who is barren, without offspring, is called to sing. In this passage, God
is referring to Israel as a barren one. She has broken the Mosaic Covenant and
is experiencing the curses God promised.
But, the barren woman is to sing because her
children will be “more than the children of her who is married.” This is not
referring to having physical babies. Why do I say that? Because Paul makes it
clear, in the New Testament, that this is the promise of spiritual children.
In contrasting the New Covenant with the Old, Paul quotes
this Isaiah passage in Galatians 4:26-28 when he says,
But the Jerusalem above is free, and she is
our mother. For it is written,
“Rejoice, O
barren one who does not bear;
break forth and cry aloud, you who are not in labor!
For the children of the desolate one will be more
than those of the one who has a husband.”
Now
you, brothers, like Isaac, are children of promise.
In other words, God makes the barren one fruitful by
bringing forth many “children of promise” (i.e., spiritual children) into the family of God. This is why Paul tells
these Gentiles (i.e., non-Jewish
believers) that this prophecy is fulfilled in their being included as “children
of the promise.” This
is one vista of the coming changes.
In Isaiah 56, there is yet another glimpse of change
and hope for those who are not married. There we read about “the eunuch.” A
eunuch is a man who is unable to have children. Usually it was a man who had
been taken captive to serve in a king’s court and was castrated so that he
would have undivided attention to serve the king (i.e., he would have no family
of his own).
In the Old Testament, being a eunuch was not a good
thing. It meant being kept out of the assembly of God (Deut. 23:1) and missing
out on the blessings of physical descendants. But, in Isaiah, we see an amazing
statement of coming joy for the eunuch:
and let not the eunuch say,
“Behold,
I am a dry tree.”
For thus says the Lord:
“To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths,
who
choose the things that please me
and
hold fast my covenant,
I will give in my house and within my walls
a
monument and a name
better
than sons and daughters;
I will give them an everlasting name
that
shall not be cut off. (Is. 56:3b-5)
This one who was considered a “dry tree” has reason
to rejoice if he belongs to God. God will give him “a monument and a name better than sons and daughters” and “an everlasting name that shall not be cut
off.” This is incredible. This eunuch is unable to experience the physical
blessings in the Old Testament, but when God’s salvation comes in its fullness (Is.
56:1) he will experience blessings greater than he could imagine.
So, change is coming. Blessings are on the horizon for “singles.” Yet we are left
wondering how this change comes about.
To see how, we must go back to earlier sections of Isaiah and pick up the
thread of the coming seed and redemption.
In Isaiah 7:14, we read that “the virgin shall
conceive and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel [which means God with
us].” Even though Israel has been
unfaithful, God will be faithful to his promises to Abraham. And the hope rests
in this Divine Son. Furthermore, this Divine Son will also sit “on the throne
of David” (Is. 9:7).
But,
how will this Son bring about the promised redemption?
The answer is found in Isaiah 53 where we read of
the “suffering servant” who is crushed by the LORD as a guilt offering for the
sins of God’s people (v. 4-6, 10).[12] This servant suffers the
wrath of God to redeem sinners. He is “cut off out of the land of the living”
(Is. 53:8b). That means he dies with no offspring and under the curse of God’s
law. But, in verse 10 we see things take a turn. We read,
when his soul [i.e.,
the servant] makes an offering for guilt,
he
shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days;
the will of the Lord shall
prosper in his hand. (Is. 53:10b)
The servant lives even after his death! How else could he “see his offspring” and
“prolong his days” after he is
crushed by the LORD? He dies to deal
with the sins of his people, yet he lives and creates a people for himself (i.e.,
“his offspring”). As Barry Danylak puts it,
Whereas the
servant dies as a cursed man without family or progeny, in his death he becomes
exalted of God (Is. 52:13) and blessed with an abundance of spiritual offspring
who visibly emerge through the results of the obedience of his sacrificial
death.[13]
So, the joy for barren Israel and barren individuals
comes after this servant has suffered, died, and risen to see His offspring.
The
New Testament: Marriage and
Singleness Are Good
In case you are unsure who this servant is, the New
Testament makes it clear that Jesus is
the servant and the child we read about in Isaiah.[14] Jesus is the Seed of the
woman who crushes Satan.
He is the son of Adam, Abraham, and David. With his arrival, the fulfillment of God’s
promised redemption comes. Additionally, the floodgates of promised blessings
for the barren and the eunuch break open.
A
New Perspective on Singleness Arrives
The first hint of this deluge of blessings comes as
Jesus discusses marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:1-12. Jesus makes a statement
that we often gloss over. It is one which would have been utterly shocking to His
original audience. Remember, the Old Testament has had a heavy focus on
marriage and childbearing. In this context, Jesus says,
“Not everyone can
receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth,
and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves
eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to
receive this receive it” (Matt. 19:11-12 emphasis added).
He says there are three classes of “eunuch.” Two of
which we have seen before in the Old Testament: 1. Eunuchs who were born that
way, and 2. Eunuchs who have been made that way by men. Now, with His coming,
there are eunuchs who “have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom
of heaven.” In other words, now that the Seed has come, there is actually a
category of “singles” that choose to be single for the purpose of serving the Kingdom
of God!
The
New Covenant and Spiritual Offspring
Now that Jesus has come and died and rose from the
dead, the plan of redemption has entered into a new phase -- offspring are no
longer merely physical. At the end of the Gospels Jesus gives the command to
seek spiritual offspring when he says, “Go therefore and make disciples of all
nations” (Matt. 28:19a). The barren and eunuch and all singles can
now be fruitful by seeking to have spiritual children through evangelism and
discipleship. It is clear that Paul, a single man, did this. He said to the
Corinthian believers, “I became your father in Christ Jesus through the gospel”
(1 Cor. 4:15b).
The
New Covenant and the Believer’s Blessings
In addition, the New Covenant changes the way
individual believers experience the blessings of God. Now physical progeny and inheritance
are not central. The spiritual family of God takes priority over physical
family. Our love for Jesus must outweigh any other relationship. Jesus said, “Whoever
loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son
or daughter more than me is not worthy of me” (Matt. 10:37).
The new importance of singleness does not mean “being alone” is now good (cf.
Gen. 2:15). It means that in Christ we have a new family and are not alone,
even when we are unmarried.
The New Covenant means blessings are for all who
will obey God’s Word, even if they are barren. In Luke 11:27-28, we see Jesus
teaching this.
As he said these
things, a woman in the crowd raised her voice and said to him, “Blessed is the
womb that bore you, and the breasts at which you nursed!” But he said, “Blessed rather
are those who hear the word of God and keep it!” (see also Mark 3:31-35)
“True blessing is not in having children and a
family (even having perfect children like Jesus!), but rather in truly hearing
the word of God and keeping it.”
Those who hear and respond to the gospel
of Jesus Christ now have every spiritual blessing guaranteed for eternity (Eph.
1:3-14).
Those who are saved by the gospel have a heavenly
inheritance. This was true for the Old Testament saints, too. The difference is
that we who live after the New Covenant has taken effect have the Spirit
indwelling us as the guarantee of our inheritance. So, even if we lack a spouse
and children, we have an internal witness that the blessings of God are ours. This
is what Paul says of Christians:
In him you also,
when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in
him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who
is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the
praise of his glory (Eph. 1:13-14).
New Testament believers can clearly see our
inheritance is secured in the gospel by the Holy Spirit.
Putting
it All Together
We began by comparing Genesis 2:15 and 1 Corinthians
7:8 and 38. We asked how it was possible to understand these passages together.
How is it that singleness goes from “not good” to “good?” Now we have seen the
answer.
Jesus
is the Promised Offspring that Brought about the Promised Redemption
For starters, the seed of the woman and the
Abrahamic and Davidic covenants find their fulfillment in Jesus. Jesus brings in the New Covenant, and there
is something truly “new” about the New Covenant. In the Old, the redemptive storyline
was all about promises being made and preparing the way for the fulfillment of
God’s promises through one nation. Now that the promised Offspring has arrived,
the focus is on going to tell the good news to all the nations. This is why we go from the command “be
fruitful and multiply” in the physical sense (Gen 1:28) to “go therefore and
make disciples of all nations” (Matt. 28:19a).
Jesus
Secures Spiritual Blessings for Believers
Under the Old Covenant, the blessings of God were
most clearly experienced by physical means:
having offspring and an inheritance in the Promised Land. In the New Covenant,
the blessings of God are experienced in terms of spiritual family and
offspring. In addition, every believer has an inheritance from God that they
can see by faith: “having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may
know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his
glorious inheritance in the saints” (Eph. 1:18).
Therefore
Marriage and Singleness Are Valuable
Perhaps, a word of “balance” is helpful here. This “fresh”
awareness regarding singleness is not meant to say that marriage is done away with
or unimportant. Jesus has a high view of marriage (Matt. 19:1-9), and Paul says
it was designed to put the relationship of Jesus and His bride, the Church, on
display (Eph. 5:31-32). So, it isn’t that marriage is spiritualized away and of
minor importance.
Instead, under the New Covenant, marriage and
singleness both serve God’s plan of
redemption. Also, married and single believers both experience the fullness of the New Covenant blessings through
Christ at this very moment. With the arrival of the Seed and the redemption He
brings, singleness was also redeemed.
Dear brother or sister, do you see that singleness
is not a hindrance to serving God or experiencing His blessings? If He has
redeemed you then thank Him for the innumerable blessings that are yours in
Christ this very moment. Spend time thinking about how you can serve His Kingdom
with your singleness. The single life can and should be a rich and full way of
life for some Christians. Jesus redeemed it.
Copyright Ben Khazraee. You may share this article with others, but please direct them to this blog rather than posting the text to your own website, blog, etc. You may share printed copies with friends as long as you do not charge more than the cost of producing the copies.
